Let me start with a confession. I have never written a fashion related article in my life. As for that piss-pot of stupidity (above) I have no further comment to make other than…. WTF?

So, why start now?

Maybe the reason I have decided to write a fashion funny is because I’ve spent the last 6 months slowly decaying in a pair of manky track-suit bottoms which have recently started talking to me.

Surely I’m not the only one going slowly mad – it’s true for many people working from home today right?

Anyway putting my craziness aside for a moment let’s remember that this global connie-wonnie (C-19) panic continues to tear British industry apart.

From pubs to cinemas – from the rodent-infested parties of Parliament to the freaky-fashion shops of Finchley. Everything is disintegrating faster than Boris Johnson can spin a U-turn in a catholic church.

So maybe this is the time for a nut-job with a spell-checker and a keyboard to give the fashion industry a much needed promotional boost.

Yeah, let’s do it….

Freaky Fashion Funnies

For the record I’ve always believed that fashion designers are as creative with needles as Salvador Dali was with crayons.

Jokes aside we’ve all seen bizarre fashion spoofs but some of these new-age designers and their creations are hard to grasp.

Take a look at these pictures. They were ALL found on the websites of some of the biggest fashion houses in the business.

Looking at them your first reaction might be to just burst out laughing, or maybe you’ll just scratch your head in utter confusion.

Maybe both.

Above you’ll see a design that fits the confusion option perfectly. This rather strange look – incontinence in a pair of jeans – was created by a brand called Wet Pants Denim.

I’m sure I don’t really need to say this but the urine-stained crotch look is not for everyone.

The next fashion explosion I have for you has got to be a contender for First Lady of Camel Toe.

WTF is this designer trying to do – give tips on how to keep a man? Surely not, this is a messy minge moment just waiting to happen.

Above we have these three muppets wearing designs which have social media shenanigans written all over them.

Silly me, I’ve forgotten what high camp knob jockeys and E-Bay f**kery was all about. These designs assure me that both are still alive and kicking.

And then we come to the Love Blood leggings. Whilst this design is clearly inspired by a need to raise awareness of women’s causes, it really is nasty. A great cause true … but is a blood soaked mingee really the best way of going about it.

What’s the chance that this designer starts selling bloodied tights called I Can’t Tonight and eBay send them out to you with a used tampon?

Oops too late…. see below.

We’ve all read those drama-filled fashionistas who like to write about meanie designers who make them wait around like the rest of us have to at a Tesco’s check-out.

Well dearies…. there might be a very good reason for that.

I barely know where to begin in describing the designs below…. clearly the sludge of stupidity is a never ending bog of…. “Can’t But Me Love”.  

Let’s end with a joke borrowed from the amazing WTF Fashion Shark. <—This lady really knows her fashion and is as funny as hell with her commentary.

A man goes back to the doctor, who tells him that there is good news and bad news.

The good news, he says, is that the man has a day to live.

The man is stunned.

He asks:

“What’s the bad news?”

The doctor replies:

“I forgot to call you yesterday”.

Talking of “Can’t But Me Love”….

Author: Michael W

Special thanks to

WTF Fashion Shark

Music: MonaLisa Twins